{"id":1540,"date":"2011-08-28T12:26:54","date_gmt":"2011-08-28T20:26:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/?p=1540"},"modified":"2011-08-29T19:51:20","modified_gmt":"2011-08-30T03:51:20","slug":"jailbird","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/?p=1540","title":{"rendered":"Jailbird"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"\/blog\/blogpix\/insidebird.jpg\" width=\"400\" height=\"300\" alt=\"[IMAGE] house sparrow\" \/><\/p>\n<p><font color=#4F4E81>&#8230;click to listen:<\/font><\/a><br \/>\n<a href=\"\/RealAudio\/EvensongAscendit.mp3\" style=\"text-decoration:none\"><\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"\/EvensongSuitepg1s.html\" style=\"text-decoration:none\" target=\"_blank\"><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"\/blog\/blogpix\/moregn.jpg\"\/><font color=#4F4E81>&#8230;about the music<\/font><\/a><\/p>\n<p><i><font color=#346513>Music for bird brains?<\/font><\/i><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/share\" class=\"twitter-share-button\" data-count=\"none\" data-via=\"alex_shapiro\">Tweet<\/a><script type=\"text\/javascript\" src=\"http:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>Well, this gives new meaning to the name, &#8220;house sparrow.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>I&#8217;ve had to rescue an over-eager bird who ended up  <a href=\"http:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/?p=216\" style=\"text-decoration:none\" target=\"_blank\"><b><em>inside<\/em> my bird feeder <\/b><\/a> a while back, but that&#8217;s a piece of cake compared with coaxing one off of a 29 foot-high window sill and out the door.<br \/>\nAny door.<br \/>\nPleeeeeaaase??<\/p>\n<p>It happened like this, the little avian drama moment du jour: <\/p>\n<p>1. I lovingly sprinkled birdseed on the deck railing (it can get really windy on this part of the island, so I&#8217;ve given up using hanging feeders that turn into seed torpedoes).<br \/>\n2. I opened my door wide to let the warm sea air in while I worked. Or, procrastinated from working. It matters not which.<br \/>\n3. Cute little birdies descended toward the railing for the free buffet. Awwww.<br \/>\n4. After a little while, so did an eagle.<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"\/blog\/blogpix\/eagle3.jpg\" width=\"400\" height=\"299\" alt=\"[IMAGE] bald eagle\" \/><br \/>\n<em>Lunch?<\/em><br \/>\n<span style=\"clear: both;\"><br \/><\/span><\/p>\n<p>5. All the cute little, potential birdie crudit\u00c3\u00a9s instantly, chaotically scattered.<br \/>\n6. One went the wrong way.<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" src=\"\/blog\/blogpix\/jailbird.jpg\" width=\"400\" height=\"286\" alt=\"[IMAGE] jailbird\" \/><br \/>\n<em>&#8220;Uh, bake me a cake with a nail file in it, okay guys?&#8230;&#8221;<\/em><br \/>\n<span style=\"clear: both;\"><br \/><\/span><\/p>\n<p>And so, it became a waiting game. Lacking any 30-foot long objects that just happen to be lying around, I briefly considered gently lobbing rolled-up socks at the poor fella with my good pitching arm. Of course, I&#8217;m a musician nerd and I don&#8217;t have a good pitching arm, but why should that stop me? Anyhow, before I could get upstairs to my lingerie closet (let&#8217;s see, would he prefer lace, or just a simple tube sock?), the birdie took off on a self-guided tour of my interior decorating. Every door and window that I could swing wide for his easy escape from prison had been opened, and yet this guy managed to wildly flap around in circles while I just prayed he didn&#8217;t leave droppings on my gear. There&#8217;s nothing in my insurance policy that covers repairs due to bird poop. Although if anyone were to comment that the piece I&#8217;m working on sounds like crap, I&#8217;d be able to smile broadly and proclaim, &#8220;Why, as a matter of fact, yes it does. Thank you!&#8221;.<\/p>\n<p>His aerial tour went on for quite some time. We were both getting dizzy.<br \/>\nThen suddenly, a terrible thing happened: after making yet another full-speed lap inside the house, he bonked himself right into a window. Yikes.<br \/>\nI watched as he plummeted in slow motion, hoping that he was just stunned.<br \/>\nWhich thankfully, he was.<br \/>\nWhich thankfully, gave me a momentary advantage.<br \/>\nWith his tiny feet clinging to a sofa pillow, I carefully maneuvered him toward an open door.<br \/>\nHe fluttered, paused, fluttered some more, and then whoosh! Out the door he went, to settle on a rock two feet away. I brought him seed and a little water while he collected himself (my mothering instinct kicks in at times like this, and only at times like this), lectured him on the use of turn signals (see? I shoulda been a mother), advised him to get his Global Positioning Sparrow unit fixed (okay, if not a mother, then maybe a mechanic), and went back to work (or procrastinating, whatever I was doing before all this activity).<\/p>\n<p>A few minutes later he was gone. My jailbird flew the coop, and I&#8217;m hoping his recidivism rate is very, very low.<br \/>\nBecause my ceiling is very, very high!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8230;click to listen: &#8230;about the music Music for bird brains? Tweet Well, this gives new meaning to the name, &#8220;house sparrow.&#8221; I&#8217;ve had to rescue an over-eager bird who ended up inside my bird feeder a while back, but that&#8217;s a piece of cake compared with coaxing one off of a 29 foot-high window sill [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1540","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-musings"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1540"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1540"}],"version-history":[{"count":35,"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1540\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1575,"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1540\/revisions\/1575"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1540"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1540"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.alexshapiro.org\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1540"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}