January 11, 2009
From 0 to 47: funny looking, but cute.
I have a theory that if I were to spell my first name with three x’s at the end and register a website address as such, I would get a LOT more traffic. Of course, once the visitors arrived and found a smiling but far-too-clothed woman in all the photographs, they might be more than a tad ticked off. As a marketing plan, it just seems like it could backfire.
Well, this is all I can offer up in the way of nudie pix, anyway. Ok, I won’t talk about a few snapshots here and there, courtesy of cute camera-toting boyfriends over the years. Nope. Well, I guess I just did. But hey, that was a loooong time ago! Good thing I wasn’t going for that Miss America tiara. Innocent nudity apparently equals instant career destruction.
Well, not for me. At least, not yet. The day’s still young. Here I am in New York City after my bath in the kitchen sink, looking like Calgon took me away (you actually have to be around my age to even appreciate that reference). I think I was about 23 in this photo and about to towel off and grab a pizza and a beer. Ok, no, I lied. I couldn’t have fit into the sink at 23. 19: possibly. Now: fuggedaboutit. I’m quite small, but not quite that small. But I’m pretty sure about the pizza and the beer.
I’ve now completed 47 rotations around the sun, and am very happy to be beginning a 48th swirl on the cosmic dance floor. Whheeeeee! I think the music clip I’ve selected for the occasion sums up my wacky, often-in-perpetual motion life nicely.
I neglected to mention last week that there’s another birthday here: that of this salinity-laden blog, which is starting its fourth orbit through the internet tubes. Since January of 2006 I’ve been nurturing this little beast like a beloved child, and it’s resulted in a lot of joy and virtually no frustration at all (which indicates to me that given the way my life is, opting for the blog and not the toddler was a good plan).
Should any of you kelphistos who have not lost every dime in this sad economy wish to get me and my little blog a present for our birthdays, we both would be thrilled if you’d download, or buy the physical CD (which I will inscribe to you!), of my chamber music disc, Notes from the Kelp. The links have been staring at you for a year in that right-hand side bar… c’mon, you know you’ve seen ’em, you know you’ve looked away and thought to yourself, “darn, she’s so nice, it’s got a groovy cover, I know I should buy this CD, but… uh… not today!” Well, now’s your chance. Makes a great gift for all the algae specialist biologists in your life! Makes a great coaster for that wheat grass and seaweed protein energy drink your weird friend is always trying to get you to try. And, it even makes a decent 80 minutes of music, too!
Otherwise, I might end up just looking for the rest of the year like I did my first year:
And we wouldn’t want that!
Upon reflection of these photographic blasts from my past, I hereby open up a caption contest for one or both of them. Be creative. Go nuts. Make me laugh. Make everyone else who reads them positively hysterical. You cannot hurt my feelings, trust me.